Where shall I run to?
by Floatlikeafeather
Summary: Following on from the episode on 26/4/19 at the squat
1. Chapter 1

"Jog on Princess"

The cold air hit her face as she stepped outside, jumping slightly as the door slammed shut behind her. Where could she go? What would she do? She stumbled forward, her eyes adjusting to the light, it felt like days since she had last left the safety of the house. It probably was, she had lost all track of time, lost track of everything; her mind was whirring at a hundred miles an hour, yet she couldn't think. He had come to get her; she had heard him from her hiding place upstairs shouting and pleading for scraps of information. She had almost called out to him, part of her longed to feel his arms around her, protecting her, but she knew that this would just have made everything worse. Peter had always had that hold over her, he would lull her into a false sense of security and then betray her, just as everyone did.

She found herself aimlessly walking down the road, boarded up houses on both sides, a place for people with no other options. It was a place so familiar to her, like stepping back in time. She had always hated this estate but being here helped her remember her past, keep something of herself when everything else felt so foreign. When she had left the medical centre all those days ago she had drifted back here almost by accident. She couldn't remember much of that day, except an overwhelming fear that meant she could never return home to Peter, that going back would only cause everybody pain, that 'they' would be waiting for her.

As she walked she felt a mixture of relief that she had avoided capture and despair that she was still causing pain to those she loved, she had heard the desperation in their voices earlier, wished they could understand that she wasn't worth their concern. She could hear children playing nearby, so full of hope and joy, the benefit of youth, how she wished life could be that simple again. She stopped and leant against a nearby wall, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, trying to calm her racing heart. What was she going to do? She couldn't stay around here, in case 'they' came to find her, but where else was there? She tried to concentrate, come up with a plan, but her brain wouldn't co-operate, the voices of doubt that had consumed her the last few weeks wouldn't abate. She gave up and looked around, she must have been walking for about fifteen minutes so far, the houses now surrounding her had increased in size, with well tended gardens and new cars on the driveways. She could see the curtain twitching across the street, disapproving eyes watching her. She wrapped her cardigan tighter around herself and carried on walking, eyes to the floor, wishing she could disappear. She needed to keep going, keep walking, find somewhere she could feel safe again, where she wouldn't be noticed.

A bus pulled up yards ahead of her, she considered boarding, then remembered she had no money. She had lost her cards days ago, at least she thinks they were lost, everything was so jumbled. Maybe she had thrown them away in a moment of clarity, when she realised 'they' would be monitoring them. A bus was a bad idea anyway, it would have cameras and people and noise, all things she could not bear to face. She shuddered at the thought as she moved past, at least walking left her in control of her destination, even if she didn't know yet where that was. She heard laughing behind her, probably friends sharing a joke, or was it directed at her? Did they know what she had done, think she deserved her pain? Was it all in her head? she no longer knew.

She didn't even notice the night draw in. She now had no idea where she was, she had been walking for hours, meandering through street after street, unable to shake the feeling that she was not yet lost enough, that she needed to keep going. She was exhausted. She couldn't remember the last time she had eaten a decent meal, and meaningful sleep had evaded her for so long she had given up on ever feeling rested again. But she knew she couldn't keep going for much longer. She looked around, she was now in a built up area, offices and small business surrounding her, dimly lit and almost deserted, their daytime occupants now home with their families she imagined. She noticed a doorway set back from the main street and she found herself walking towards it. She could feel the first spots of rain hitting exposed skin, and moved more quickly, grateful for the shelter the canopy above it would offer. This would have to do. She slumped against the side of the porch, pulling her knees to her chest, trying to conserve as much warmth as possible as she let her head rest against the cold brick. The occasional whirring of cars driving past just out of sight was almost comforting as she tried to relax, wondering if she would finally succumb to her tiredness, but afraid to close her eyes as she knew it would leave her vulnerable to the unknown dangers all around. She wondered if Peter was still out looking for her. She hoped he would stop now, move on with his life, find the happiness that seemed to always evade them both. She wished she could believe that he wasn't helping 'them', she knew he loved her, that he thought he was doing what was right for her. She wanted nothing more than to go back in time, she would do things so differently. She imagined being wrapped in his arms, feeling warm and loved and happy. She could still remember those times clearly, the seemingly insignificant times with him where she could just 'be', with no judgement or pretence. She felt herself finally drifting towards sleep, immersing herself in her memories.

"Oi, tramp, get a job!"

She jolted awake just in time to dodge the metal can flying directly at her as two lads sniggered as they walked away. She should have known it was too good to be true, she didn't deserve sleep anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

Her first night on the street consisted of snatched moments of sleep spread between long periods of fretful wakefulness, watching out for passers-by, hoping she would go unnoticed. As the first light pierced through the gaps in the surrounding buildings, she got ready to move, wanting to be gone before the first commuters arrived. She didn't know if she'd need to use this spot again, so had to ensure nobody saw her, recognised her. She headed away from the gradually increasing noise of the traffic, people with purpose, places to get to. She soon found herself in a small park, its calm only disturbed by the occasional jogger, passing without giving her a second glance. The ground was still wet from the previous night's rainfall, so she thought better of stopping and sitting on one of the many benches, her clothes were already damp from the morning air and she realised that she was shivering. The public toilets had hand dryers, and there was nobody nearby, so she went and used the facilities, taking the opportunity to wash her face and take a drink from the tap. When she looked in the mirror she recoiled in shock. The face staring back at her was like a ghost, drawn and pallid. Her hair hung limply, unwashed, reminding her of the little girl she once was, who she had worked so hard to leave in her past. She wondered if this was why they were after her, she had got above her station in life and they wanted to bring her back to where she belonged.

"Are you OK in there?"

A voice she didn't recognise. Was it real or had she imagined it, she was finding it harder to tell the difference.

"Hello, are you there? I just wanted to make sue you were alright. Can you come out?"

She opened the door and was faced with a middle-aged woman, who offered a concerned smile as she went to move past her.

"I didn't want to intrude but I saw you go in there a while ago and was worried."

"I'm fine" Carla muttered, looking down so she didn't have to meet her gaze. "Don't worry about me."

"I can give you numbers, if you need somewhere to stay, you need to look after yourself."

Carla felt anger rising thorough her, how dare this lady presume she would want that, did she think she was stupid, that she couldn't see through her plan to get her cornered for them? But then doubts set in. She certainly didn't look like a threat, she seemed kind. What if she could help? Carla wrestled with these conflicting thoughts, weighing up her options. She couldn't trust anyone, but she felt drawn to this woman, she didn't know why. She glanced up, and was met with another smile, which she tried to return.

"Thanks, but I need to go now."

Carla thought about how untrue that was, she had nowhere to go, she couldn't be more alone.

"Do you want to stop for a coffee or something to eat? My treat. There's a café just over there, and I've got half an hour before I'm meeting my friend. You look like you could use a warm drink."

Carla remembered then how hungry she was. Her stomach growled in anticipation, betraying her as she shook her head, this must be a trap, one she mustn't step into.

"Ok, well I have some biscuits in my bag somewhere, hang on a tick while I find them, I'm meant to be on a diet so you'll be doing me a favour if you take them. Oh yes, here they are."

The lady held them out expectantly, her confusion evident when Carla hesitated.

"Go on love, are you sure you are really OK? Can I get someone for you?"

"No, I'm fine, thank you. Thank you for these." She answered quickly, taking them from her, trying again to smile, to pretend that she was in control, that panic wasn't threatening to overwhelm her.

The woman put her hand on Carla's arm, which at first made her flinch, this was her first human contact in weeks and she realised how much she had missed it. She felt her body relax slightly as the fingers gently rubbed her sleeve, trying to offer some comfort.

"Well you take care. I'm around here most mornings if you ever need someone to talk to. I know it's none of my business, but you just seem like you could use a friend."

Carla couldn't stop the tears welling in her eyes, she needed to leave now, before she lost control completely. She mumbled a goodbye as she moved away, putting as much distance between them as she could. It was far to tempting to give in, and she couldn't let them win. She could hear the woman call after her, although the words merged into a hum that she couldn't distinguish.

When she was far enough away she stopped and her attention turned to the packet still clasped tightly in her hand. She shouldn't eat them; how did she know they were safe? But she was so hungry she decided to take the risk, savouring every mouthful, not knowing when she would eat again. She wondered if she should have stayed, if that woman would have been able to help her. She felt slightly better, maybe because of the food, she wasn't sure, but she resolved to go back to the park tomorrow, pleased that she was making a plan, this was progress.

She spent the majority of the day once again pacing the streets, trying not to stay in one area for too long. She found a museum with free admission so spent some time inside getting warm, but people were staring, they knew she didn't belong there so she left, fearing someone would recognise her and call the police.

She stole a sandwich for tea. She had done this many times in her youth, to ensure her and Rob ate when her mum was incapable of providing anything, but she still felt nervous and guilty as she walked out of the store, head bowed and hood up, ensuring she was not being followed before she dared to stop and enjoy her spoils. Eventually she was back where she had started her day, back in the doorway, trying to simultaneously block out the world and stay alert for those who would harm her. Her thoughts once again drifted to Peter, as they always did. She wondered if she would ever see him again. She resolved that when everything had died down, when she was sure they weren't still tracking her, she could go back and see him, as long as he didn't notice her. Watching him from afar was better than no contact at all. This brought her some comfort, at least he this meant he wouldn't be lost to her forever. Eventually in the early hours her body once again gave in to her fatigue and she succumbed to a fitful, dreamless sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

""Get off me! Please! leave me alone!"

Carla woke with a start, screaming at whoever it was that was wrestling with her, trying to stop him. It took her a few seconds to realise what was happening, and by then it was too late. He was running off and she knew there was no chance of catching him, her handbag tucked firmly under his arm. She couldn't catch her breath, terror coursing through her, unable to calm herself or think what to do next. The few people around at this early hour stared in horror at her distressed state, and then gave her a wide berth, not wanting to disturb their busy mornings with this clearly mad homeless woman. It must have taken twenty minutes for her to calm down enough to process what had happened, to realise what it meant. The bag had nothing of value, any money long gone. Her phone was in there, but it had now been switched off for weeks and she had no intention of ever using it, so this did not concern her. It was her medication that mattered. Even in her confused state she knew she needed to keep taking it. She had kept the ritual of her twice daily dosage, a routine that she had been following for so many months it had become second nature. There had been a couple of weeks supply left and she hadn't thought any further ahead than that, but now the issue was urgent. She tried to think what she had been told about missing her doses, but those conversations felt like a lifetime ago. She wished Roy was there, he was the one who researched it for her, helped her think of questions to ask the doctors all those months ago. She couldn't remember anything now, except that they had all said not to stop taking them. What if they were lying though? What if the tablets were part of the problem, messing with her mind, stopping her thinking straight? Maybe he had done her a favour. She would find out soon enough.

It had now been six days since she had left the squat, each day merging into the one before. She had been back to the park a couple of times hoping to see the kind woman again but had no success so decided that she too was against her, resolving not to try again. She had found it harder each day to summon the energy to move on, spending hours listlessly hunched near the doorway, watching people move past, in her more lucid moments looking for signs that they were watching her. Occasionally people had tried to interact with her, offering her food or water, or even money. This usually added to her agitation, and they soon left her alone when they saw the state she was in, muttering at them to leave, refusing to make eye contact. She was barely eating, she had been escorted from the store on the fourth day she had gone to take food; the manager had taken pity on her and decided not to get the police involved, but this had scared her enough to not risk it again. After she missed her third dose of medication she came to the conclusion that this too had been a lie. She was still alive, she obviously didn't need them. She missed her bag though. She now had nothing in the world except the clothes she was sitting in. It had become like a security blanket, she had held it close whilst she slept, and she now found it even harder to drift off. She sometimes wondered if it would be better if 'they' did find her. No punishment they could give would be worse than this surely? If she was evil like they thought then at least they could stop her hurting anybody else. These thoughts were fleeting, beaten down by the fear of what would happen to her, she would lose all control. She knew she needed to stay in control.

By the eighth day she barely moved at all. She was sitting, lost in herself, her grip on reality slipping yet further away. She just felt sad and alone, her mania of previous days replaced by a disconnection from everything. This was why she didn't see him approaching. He had made it to within feet of her before she sensed there was somebody there, slowly looking up to see who was invading her space, not prepared for who she saw.

"Carla? It's really you? I've come to take you home." 


	4. Chapter 4

He couldn't believe it. He had almost given up hope before he'd practically stumbled into her. It took a few seconds to recognise her, and he was taken aback by what he saw. She looked so vulnerable, so small. She hadn't noticed him at first, her head bowed, knees drawn to her chest, so unlike the woman he knew and cared for deeply, but when she did look up he saw a glimmer of recognition in her eyes before they began to fill with tears.

"Carla?"

She looked back at him, unable to answer, a flood of emotion threatening to overwhelm the numbness of the past hours. He was the one person she knew would never lie to her. But he had given up on her weeks ago, so why was he here?

"Speak to me, can you get up?"

Roy crouched down so he was at her eye level, alarmed at the way she recoiled and looked away, not sure what he should do next. Social interactions had never been his strong point, but he was way out of his depth. Her leant forward and took her hand in his. She felt so cold, and he could feel her shaking beneath his touch.

"Here, have my coat, you must be freezing."

He carefully wrapped it around her, taking in her profile; her cheekbones were more pronounced than ever, her frame had always been petite but now her clothes hung off her. However it was her eyes that scared him most. The sparkle that had always been there was missing somehow, he couldn't explain it, knew it wasn't logical, but she felt like a stranger.

"Roy, help me?"

It was barely audible but gave him hope. She was now staring at him, tears rolling down her cheeks, searching his face for the answer.

"Of course, why else would I be here.

She felt an overwhelming sense of relief. Roy would know what to do, he always did. She tried to stand, dizziness threatening to overwhelm her but felt a hand steadying her, supporting her. She leant into his chest, feeling the warmth of his embrace as he guided her forward, safe for the first time in far too long.

"Shall we go home?"

His question stopped her in her tracks. She didn't have a home, he had thrown her out, and Peter's wasn't safe anymore, nowhere was. She shook her head, her agitation rising as she tried to make sense of what was going on.

"Where are you taking me?"

Roy felt her tense up in his arms, he had been warned that she was unwell, but he could never have imagined her current state and found himself wondering how she could have got this bad without anybody close to her noticing and trying to help. This, whatever it was, must have started a long time ago for her to be in this condition. He realised he had to include himself in that list of people who had allowed this to happen, but resolved that he wouldn't be letting her down again.

"Back to my flat, that will always be your home if you want it to be. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me, but I promise that changes now."

She wasn't sure what to do next. Roy's flat had always felt like home, but she couldn't go back to that street. 'They' would find her, she was sure of it. But then Roy was always true to his word, so if he said it was OK then she had to believe him didn't she?

"Will Rana know I'm there?"

Roy had been told about the messages Carla had left on Rana's phone, but had hoped it was a moment of madness, perhaps fuelled by alcohol; this was the confirmation that it was so much more, and he paused to consider his response. He could feel Carla growing more agitated and wasn't sure whether his answer would make things better or worse.

"Do you trust me?"

He held both her shoulders and looked directly into her eyes whilst asking and was relieved to see her nod and attempt a smile in return.

Rana died in the factory collapse. I promise that she did. It was a dreadful accident, you couldn't have known what would happen, but that is the truth. She's gone."

Carla continued to meet his gaze, she desperately wanted to believe him. If Rana wasn't after her then who was? She knew she deserved everything that was coming, she felt it deep inside. But if Rana wasn't behind it all then maybe she could go back, after all they'd find her eventually wherever she hid. She nodded again and leant back into his embrace, letting him guide her towards the car, she was finally going home.

As they got closer to their destination, Carla's level of fear once again began to increase. Roy noticed her demeaner change, she was glancing around nervously, her breaths quickening. He considered taking her somewhere else before deciding it was just prolonging the inevitable. He had originally planned to take her directly to the hospital but after seeing her reactions to events so far he had decided that he needed to be true to his word, to keep her trust and stop her absconding again. His aim now was to convince her over the coming hours that she needed more help than he could offer, hopefully consenting to go there of her own free will. He had no idea whether it would work, but at least she'd be warm and safe in the meantime. When he pulled up outside the flat, he was relieved to find the street deserted. That should make things easier. The last thing either of them needed was a local busybody after the latest gossip, or even worse, one of the many on the street still convinced that Carla had intentionally caused people harm. He went around and opened her car door, and was relieved when she came willingly.

Once inside the flat, Carla collapsed into the couch, grateful for its comfort after the days spent on cold concrete. Roy persuaded her that a shower would be a good idea, and she noticed for the first time the state of the clothes she had been wearing. The warm water did bring her aching joints some relief, and she came out to find clean pyjamas and dressing gown laid out on her bed and the smell of cooking. Despite this she couldn't shake the mounting feeling that something was wrong. As she sat back down in the lounge Roy came over with a box of her tablets.

"You left some here when you went to Peter's and from memory you would have just run out of your other supply. It's a good job I found you when I did, as you know you can't be without them"

Carla eyed him suspiciously. Maybe he was in cahoots with 'them' after all. She needed to find out.

"I don't need them, they've been using them to control me. I haven't taken any for days and I'm fine."

Roy's heart sunk at these words. How could he convince her she was wrong, that they had been keeping her alive for over a year? He could see how tired and frail she was, she needed urgent medical attention already, but by continuing without her medication she would quickly be in an even more dire state than she was now.

"You need to take them now Carla, you must remember what the doctors said. I promise it's for your own good."

It was in that moment that she became sure that her trust had been misplaced. She had got it wrong, put her faith in the wrong person. She needed to get away, needed the man that she now realised was truly on her side, why else would everybody have tried to keep them apart for so long.

She had to find Peter.


	5. Chapter 5

Carla couldn't let on to Roy that she was wise to his plan. She had taken her tablet in front of him, pushing it to the side of her mouth, spitting it out and pocketing it when she was sure he wasn't watching. She decided she would ask about Peter after they had eaten, she was so hungry she would risk the chance Roy had put something in her food; after all he was eating the same, and anyway as far as he was concerned her tablet was doing its job. She stayed quiet while she ate, focusing fully on the lasagne in front of her which she was finding surprisingly hard to eat, her stomach no longer used to a proper portion of food. She eventually gave up, the majority still piled on the side of her plate, and was glad when Roy didn't comment. She waited for him to clear up, busying himself with trivial tasks like he was putting off having to speak to her.

Roy watched her as he was drying up. He was becoming more concerned by the minute and was trying to decide on his next move. He had still had hope earlier that he could get through to her, but her behaviour was so bizarre; she was constantly on edge and he kept catching her glaring at him when she thought he wasn't looking, a look of pure venom that sent a chill down his spine. She hadn't spoken since they had sat at the table, he had tried some small talk while they were eating but she wouldn't engage, it was like she couldn't process what he was saying. He needed to get reinforcements but it was already late, so he concluded the best action would be to try and settle her here for the night, and reassess in the morning.

"Where's Peter? I thought he would come for me?"

She ended up blurting the question out, she couldn't wait any longer. She needed to know; it was all she could focus on. When Roy didn't answer straight away she struggled to contain her anger. But then he did respond, and that was so much worse. Relapse, rehab. There were two possible explanations, either Roy was lying to her and she was in even more danger than she had thought, or it was true and Peter's life was yet another that she had destroyed. She really was rotten to the core. She believed deep down that it was the truth, the only reason that would prevent him being with her. She needed him, couldn't live without him. She couldn't take this any more.

Michelle was about to leave the Bistro when she took the call. She dashed straight over to the café, her first reaction relief that her best friend was finally home, and was met by Roy at the door. His expression told her that things were extremely serious. Roy wasn't one to over-dramatise, and he was clearly at his wits end. She entered the flat to find Carla curled into a tight ball on the couch, shaking violently and muttering something inaudible over and over. Michelle had known Carla for most of their lives, they had been through the most horrific things together, but she had never seen her like this. She had witnessed Carla go to some very dark places, she knew she had attempted suicide before, after that bastard Frank raped her. Michelle hadn't been there at the time but was with her from a few weeks afterwards, saw the impact it had, the haunted look in her eyes had remained long after he had gone. Then there was the miscarriage; Michelle still couldn't forgive Peter for the trauma he had caused, he had ripped Carla's heart out, and it was her and Roy who had been left to pick up the pieces. Well, Rob too, but the less said about him the better. Through all these times; the flat fire, Aiden's suicide, no matter how broken Carla was, she had always been in control, even if it was of her own destruction. This time was different. Everything Michelle had been told about the lead up to Carla disappearance suggested that this was something else, that her friend was ill, and now the confirmation was right in front of her.

"Carla… It's Michelle love, I've missed you so much!"

She waited for Carla to respond, she could feel the tears running down her cheeks, but she had to stay strong, her friend needed her now and she couldn't let her down.

At first there was no reaction, and then Carla slowly lifted her head, seemingly unable to focus or understand what was happening. It was Michelle's first real chance to see the physical change in her friend, and she audibly gasped as she moved forward to wrap her in her arms. Carla didn't protest so Michelle pulled her close, gently stroking her hair, doing all she could to soothe and calm her. Roy stood back and watched; he too was struggling to maintain composure. Finally, after over an hour, Carla succumbed to exhaustion, falling asleep in Michelle's embrace.

Reassured that things were more settled for he moment, Roy went into the bedroom to make a phone call to try and get some professional help to the house. He was advised that whilst there was nobody available overnight they would arrange an urgent visit for the following morning. He also kept the promise he had made to Peter, letting him know that she had been found and he was getting her help, hoping this would give him strength for his own recovery. After a final check that Michelle didn't need anything, he retired for the night.

Michelle had no idea what time she eventually dropped off. She had intended to stay awake all night, on high alert in case Carla needed her, but she too was emotionally exhausted from the evening's events so as the night wore on this became more difficult, and then impossible. She awoke with a start as daylight was just starting to seep through the blinds, taking a few seconds to remember where she was. She felt a crushing dread in the pit of her stomach as she realised that she was alone.

Carla was gone.


	6. Chapter 6

It was still dark as the cab pulled up, it had been a long drive and Peter was desperate for a cigarette, fumbling with his lighter in his haste to relieve the craving. He took a long drag, grateful for the rush of relief it brought. His dad would be angry he had abandoned rehab but what choice did he really have? He couldn't sit idly all those miles away and focus on the 12 steps to recovery when Carla was his catalyst for staying sober, his life and future depended on hers. As soon as he received Roy's call he had packed his few belongings and checked himself out of the clinic; he felt guilty about the money that was now wasted on him and knew he'd be in for a lecture when he got home, but he'd pay Claudia back somehow and show them all that this decision was the right one. He now stood on the street, breathing in the cool morning air, and waited. It was still too early to go to Roy's. He hoped Carla was sleeping and Michelle would be with her so he decided to wait an hour or so and then message to let them know he was back and coming over. This left him with too much time and nowhere to be; he wasn't going home yet, wasn't ready to face Ken so what should he do? Surplus time was not his friend at the moment, he was confident he wouldn't drink, his renewed promise to himself and those around him was holding strong, but he was compensating by chain-smoking and couldn't stop fidgeting, impatient to see her.

He paced the deserted cobbles as the dawn began to break, planning what he would say to her when they were finally reunited, how he would take care of her, love her the way she deserved. He had loved her for so many years, nobody else could come close to the effect she had on him, the electricity he felt whenever she was nearby. He had so many regrets over what had happened with them in the past but he swore would do better, be better this time around.

He flicked the remnants of his final cigarette to the floor, cursing that he had not paced himself with them, it was still hours until the shops opened and he was wound tightly enough already. As he turned to re-tread his path yet again he saw a flicker of movement across the street, by the steps of underworld. At first he thought he had imagined it but as he went to look away he saw it once more. He strained his eyes to make out what it was and realised there was the outline of a figure, leaning against the factory wall, barely distinguishable from the surrounding shadows. He edged closer, watching them move along the metal fencing, find a small space between the panels and slip through. His pace quickened as the profile became clearer, the tiny frame and dark flowing hair confirming his fears.

She was once again barefoot, as she had been all those weeks ago. Her pyjamas swamped her body as she weaved through the rubble still covering the floor around her. Peter went to call out to her but then though better of it and continued to move forward, not wanting to startle her but panicking he would lose sight. She was moving with purpose as if she was looking for something, what exactly he couldn't work out but he knew that it couldn't be good. He watched as she paused and looked around, before changing direction and continuing her search. Should he intervene, make his presence known? She was clearly distressed, he could see her agitation even from this distance and he was terrified any unexpected noise would make things worse, so he stayed silent. She reached the base of the scaffolding and he felt his heart stop as he realised her intention.

Carla looked up as she grasped the handrail of the ladder and started to climb.


	7. Chapter 7

She could hear Aiden calling out to her. That was why she ended up here, standing outside the factory; she had heard him whispering her name from inside the flat and she followed the sound, careful not to wake Michelle or Roy as she left. She didn't understand how he could be here, but he was, he had come to rescue her. As she leaned against the wall, waiting for him to speak to her again she tried to make sense of it in her mind. He had died all those months ago; she had seen him lying lifeless on the floor, Johnny standing over him, a memory that would forever haunt her. Yet his voice was now urging her to find him, to follow him. She thought she had caught sight of him, he was heading into a fenced off area where the worst of the collapse had occurred, and she followed, moving quickly to keep up. He was always just out of view, a glimpse around a corner, not quite in focus, just out of reach. Then suddenly his voice came from high above her, coaxing her, challenging her to find a way to him.

Maybe he was a ghost. She had never believed in the supernatural, but she knew something must have made her like this, made her so evil, so hated. Was it the devil? She felt panic rising as she searched around, was that who was after her? Maybe Aiden could explain it, she just needed to reach him.

She saw the ladder and started to climb, not noticing how her bare feet were cut by the sharp metal rungs. She had reached the first platform when the realisation hit her. She knew why Aiden was here. He had come to help her escape from everything. He was going to help her die.

As he saw her start her ascent Peter broke out into a run, crossing the cobbles in seconds and reaching the fence in record time. He attempted to squeeze through, but the gap was too narrow, he couldn't get to her. She didn't seem to notice the commotion, continuing her progress towards the roof, and he knew he needed to stop her, and quickly.

"Carla!"

She hesitated, then looked down, almost losing her grip on the ladder in shock when she saw that Peter was there. She had longed to see him but now she needed him to go, he would ruin it, try to stop her. Where was Aiden? She couldn't hear him anymore and she needed him there with her. She called out to him but there was no answer so she continued with her climb, maybe he would be waiting at the top.

Peter despaired as he watched helplessly from the street below; he could hear her calling her dead brother's name. He knew how this would likely end and couldn't bear to watch it unfold. He started kicking at the thin metal fence posts, trying everything he could he could think of to prise them apart, to reach her before it was too late. The noise was disturbing the neighbours, faces pressed up against windows as they wondered what on earth was happening, but he didn't care. Finally, he managed to find a way through and he sprinted to the scaffolding, yelling out to her as he did so.

Carla had reached the last section of ladders, and climbed onto the roof, still searching for her brother, distraught that he had left her to face this alone. As she stood up another small part of the roof gave way and rubble crashed to the ground below, the remaining panels creaking as she edged along them. She could hear Peter below her, he still hadn't given up on her, she didn't understand why. She reached the edge of the roof and looked out, a crowd was gathering below. This was not how it was meant to be. She couldn't catch her breath, felt so dizzy, she needed it to end.

As he reached the top of the scaffold, Peter caught sight of her again, she had managed to move about twenty feet from where he was, and there was no way the fragile roof would support his weight too. She was dangerously close to the edge, and had clearly lost all control, if he didn't act now it would be too late. He had to find a way to get through to her.

"Do you know what most attracted me to you Carla Connor?"

She turned to look at him, he had her attention, he prayed that he could keep it.

"Your smile. And your beautiful soul. You are the strongest, most compassionate person I have ever met."

He could see the tears pool in her eyes, she was listening,

"I just need you to be strong for me now baby, I promise we can get through this."

She was completely still, a confused look on her face.

"But I'm evil, how can you love me?"

He could barely her, but her words crushed him. He yearned to hold her but she was too far away, the roof too dangerous, he needed her to come to him.

"How could I not? Please come back to me, everything will be OK."

She turned away, looking down at the increasing commotion on the ground below.

"I killed Rana. It's my time now, I don't deserve to live."

He was losing her, he could feel it. She was giving up. He needed to try again.

"Do you remember the first time you saved me? It was that night in December all those years ago, the tram crash anniversary. I was determined to drink to oblivion, and you were there, you understood. It was that night I realised that I couldn't live without you. You are my soulmate, please don't leave me now."

She turned back to face him, unsure.

"Remember what you did for Hayley? You brought joy to her last few months, were a true friend to her when she most needed it. You kept your promise to her, looked after Roy for her. You are a good person Carla."

He struggled to keep his composure, could feel the tears snaking down his cheeks, he needed her to see in herself what he saw.

"I watched you support your family after Aiden died, you were so brave, so selfless, that's the Carla I know, that's who you are. The world is better with you in it."

This was it, make or break. He could barely breathe as he waited for her reaction. She glanced behind her one last time, and slowly started to move towards him, hesitating, her eyes searching his for reassurance that he was speaking the truth. He made sure he did not break her gaze, willing her to keep moving whispering encouragement, telling her he loved her. When she was close enough he pulled her into his arms, feeling her collapse against him, trusting him to take control. They stayed there for a few minutes both unwilling to break the embrace, before Peter carefully started to guide her back towards the ground. As they reached the foot of the ladders she leaned into his chest, letting him lead the way. He was absolutely drained, he couldn't begin to imagine how Carla was feeling. But she was safe. he looked over at Michelle and Roy, and saw the relief on their faces, she had people that would help her get through this. He held her close as they walked over to the waiting ambulance, things would be very different for a while, but they would be there with her every step of the way.


End file.
